So will I

“If you left the grave behind you so will I. ” words from a song titled, ‘So will I’ by Brooke Lingertwood of Hill Song worship group and they give me a lot hope and encouragement.

There are two things that stand out from that statement:-

1). I am encouraged to know that, just as Jesus was triumphant over death so will I be triumphant over hardships and troubles of this world for He whom I look up to is victorious! John 16:33 states that in the world we will have many troubles but we should not be troubled instead have peace for He overcame and is victorious and so through Him we are victorious!

2). We have to want be free; if we are going to be free. We have to desire to leave the grave for the Lord works powerfully through a will that is willing to be free.

Take for example someone who wants to forget the shame of always being number last in class; that person will obviously have heard countless times that anyone can be successful and can be the top of the class if they desire to. The trick is though, he/she has got to want success; to get it! The heart and mind have got to want freedom from shame, ridicule, stagnation and backwardness so as to be free! Nothing comes handed down on a silver platter especially not something called victory hence success.

In my life, I have seen God get me out of the grave(s).

One of the graves was an addiction to pornography. I, unfortunately, watched pornography at the age of 11 years. My best friend’s father came with a porn tape in the house and hid it behind one of the sofa’s. His children became curious to know what was hidden and so the next day they waited for him to leave the house and when we visited them we found porn being watched. We didn’t watch it for long because it was disgusting to our hearts at the time but the harm was already done for I stayed with those images in my head/heart. As I grew older, while in high school and part of my university years I would crave for porn images because the more I watched and thought about them, the more I liked how they made me feel good. I thank God very much that I never masturbated nor tried out what I watched with men. However, my mind was reduced to the slavery of thinking about and wanting more pornographic material. To date; I consider it a miracle that I passed my K.C.P.E (final exams in primary school) for porn images would mess up my concentration. Fast forward and I met Jesus and His saving grace through the Vincentian Ministries here in Kenya. Jesus saved me from addiction to porn and now my mind is free – 7 years now! I am free to do awesome, powerful things like to write articles which inspire others in many other ways and moreso to know Christ.

Another grave was unforgiveness. For the longest time in my life I had issues with forgiving. I could hold a grudge and not let go. I used to admire my brother for it was easy for him to forgive. To date he doesn’t hold grudges. To me that is a beautiful, happy and peaceful life for I know how crazy and tiresome it is to hold grudges. I struggled with forgiving myself, my parents, friends and pretty much anyone who hurt my feelings. I remember it was hardest to forgive my mum. I used to find her unfair for she used to beat me up especially when it my brother’s fault, she would blame me for things I didn’t do. Like one time, I remember, she blamed for stealing her shoes and selling them and it the house help who did it! besides around that time I was too young to hack such! Sometimes, I felt she didn’t like it when my dad favoured me over my brothers which to be honest is not anything a child has control over!

I grew up with feelings of rejection na kuonewa hence bitterness and with time, anger towards my mum started to build up for I felt that all of it was unfair. I wanted to challenge her and speak my mind, but I also feared her very much so I didn’t. Over time, the bitterness grew and I discovered it denied me a lot of peace and denied our relationship strength and growth. It was like there was a rift between us, no depth in our love and a lack of easiness in loving especially on my end. I always felt like I had to win my mum’s affection. I didn’t like it and I hated those bitter and angry feelings and so I prayed a lot for deliverance hence freedom. I harbored those feelings for quite some time meaning the bitterness and anger were deeply rooted but, I declared now that the Lord is powerful and faithful for I was set free!! I prayed and moreso through the Novena of the Precious Blood; not for 9 days, but for 2 months until this bitterness left me. It wasn’t easy and I felt like giving up but the desire to be free was too strong and God saw the persistence and faith for I did eventually receive my freedom. The pain is gone, the bitterness is gone and I was able to open up to my mum – she listened, she understood me and she even apologized!!!! The relationship that the devil was trying to destroy was restored back to former glory – it’s even better😍. It grows stronger because we can now talk with my mum for hours on phone something we never used to do. I usually can’t wait to go and visit her and just be with her and talk for more hours😊.

The above are examples of how Jesus got me out of graves that devil had dug and put me in. The reason I say the devil dug, is because the devil can and does create situations that allow us to enter a grave without our knowledge. He can create situations in families, between friends, in church even in non -spiritual groups where enmity, strife, hate, bitterness will grow and then he pushes us to the grave.

Psalms 121:1-2 I will look to the mountain and where will my help come from? My help will come from the Lord who made the heaven and the earth.

Jesus Christ is our sure help in all situations:- the bad, crazy, worse…. He is the way out. He is the way out of a painful, shameful, backward, traumatic past to a new life like Zacchaeus, the sinful woman, the adulterous woman. He is the way to achieving our heart’s desire!

Do you want to leave a grave(s) maybe one called addiction, bitterness, unforgiveness, rejection, poverty, sickness, pride, witchcraft, demonic oppression and possession? Answer, you can.


I) You have to want out.

II) Pray and ask Jesus to set you free.

For he came for the lost, he came to love the rejected, the abandoned and abused. He came to give hope where there is little or none. He came to set the captives free. Luke 4:18. Believe this and you are on your way to freedom, and a permanent one sealed with His powerful blood. Alleluia.

God has the power to raise us out of any grave whether it’s a 6ft or 100ft deep. Irregardless of how long we have stayed there; he is able. There’s nothing new of difficult for God as is written in Ecclesiastes 1:9, that there is nothing new under the sun. It’s just a matter of being humble, cry out for help and believe and trust that He will do it and sure enough He will.

I am not saying that it will be easy, I am, however, saying that persistence and focus pays off and Jesus is mighty to save. Alleluia! And when you feel like giving up; remember that you are not alone, many – very many people experience difficulties that you would not want to experience so, cheer up and push forward until you receive victory. Also know that the chance to see another day means – try again and long as you’ve got breath, you’ve got another chance to choose and fight for freedom and with God on out side, we are sure to be victorious!

God loves you and God bless you.

Psalms 27:13-14 I know that I will live to see the LORD’s goodness in this present life. Trust in the LORD. Have faith, do not despair. Trust in the LORD.

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